Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Not Dressed Up with Somewhere to Go

Had we known how much time we would spend as adults looking for car keys, sunglasses, etc., would we have been so inclined, as children, to always be playing hide-and-go-seek? Just one of the many deep thoughts that I come up with each day.

Taking off from Kittenpie's post about the misery of dressing the postpartum body, I would like to add further complaints. Right now, my body is thinking of returning to it's regular weight, but hasn't quite reached this ultimate goal. For the time being, I wear old jeans that were always too big for me, and an assortment of large t-shirts that I purchased during my previous postpartum wardrobe woes. Overall, I have succeeded in being not naked, which you should all be thanking me for. I look schleppy, and haven't cared too much until recently. This look is starting to create a problem for me. I keep getting invited to events that require me to look nice. For the most part, I refuse to buy clothes for this current body of mine. To me, buying clothes right now is like admitting defeat. I do NOT plan to spend much time in this current shape, and I will NOT appease this shape by trying to make it look nice. Then last week, there was an unveiling for my late mother-in-law, preceded by a nice dinner with some relatives that came in from out of town. Ripped jeans were not gonna cut it. I tore through my closet to find anything that would go over these unwanted curves of mine, and managed, with the help of a pair of Spanx, to look like I was at least trying. Spanx are great if breathing isn't important to you. I was in a bit of pain, but I got through the two events, and thought, phew! Unfortunately, my relief was short lived. We are now in the middle of the Jewish High Holidays, three of which days require me to dress up nice and attend synagogue services. I'm using the breast-feeding excuse to get out of actually going to the synagogue, but there are still extended family meals to attend, where everyone still has to look nice. Yesterday I re-used an outfit from last week, and today I'm just sayin' "fack it!". That's not really what I'm sayin', but I don't usually swear in full on this site. That brings me to the three weddings I have in this upcoming month. They aren't black tie, but I know that I can't get away with the current wardrobe, with the exception of the Halloween wedding where we are encouraged to wear costumes. If it fits, I might just go in my slutty pirate outfit. What? You mean you don't have one of those too? As for the other weddings, I asked around for something to borrow, but came up short. Literally. My friends are all taller than me. I had no choice but to admit temporary defeat and buy something. So sad. Anyhow, if you are having an event, and I can't attend dressed like a bum or wearing my new, black evening dress, don't invite me. It's too stressful.

5 comments:

kittenpie said...

Man. I am starting to stress about my cousin's wedding next month, and that's just ONE event! If I had a week od them, I might just catch the plague so I could go into quarantine and skip it all... Good luck!

(Or, buy one long black skirt, and put different fancy-ish tops with it. It'll pass.)

No Mother Earth said...

And this is why all my waists are elastic. I am bee-yoo-tee-ful.

Barrie said...

It's not admitting defeat till you change the weight on your driver's licence.

Chantal said...

This phase sucks eh. I know exactly what you mean.

Melissa said...

Oh I know this dilemma. BTDT...

Slutty pirate outfit sounds good to me. I think you should wear it to every wedding. I mean what are the odds that someone else will be wearing the same outfit?