Nostalgic Crushes

Motherbumper has tagged me with a “crush” meme, asking me to share with you the list of Hollywood “hunks” whose pictures found their way into the art gallery that was my bedroom wall when I was in my pre-teen years. Naturally, I have such a list, and I blush and laugh to think about it. I’m sure that I spent the better part of my allowance money on magazines that provided me with glossy pics that I used to tape to my wall and kiss before going to sleep each night. Lately I have been noticing the modern-day versions of the teen magazines that I used to buy, and wonder if I was silly enough to get excited by headlines such as, “Zack Wants to Get to Know You Better” or “Could You Be Charlie’s Girl?” Something tells me that I was exactly the target market for this sort of thing. I really believed that if I could just meet one of these guys, we’d get married for sure. Hey, at least I had self-confidence! That being said, here is my list of guys who missed their chance:

Christopher Reeve: Yeah, that’s kind of sad to reflect on now, but it was what it was. Back in the days of Superman II, I was so crazy about him that I actually cried about the geographical distance between us. I was about eight years old and enamoured with the close-up shots of his beautiful blue eyes during some of the romantic scenes with Lois Lane. He wasn’t easy to find pictures of, so I was pretty much stuck with Superman posters that would have been more appropriate for comic book fans. Sadly or fortunately, I was too young to appreciate how the blue tights enabled me to see how well he was stacking up.

Scott Baio: I have mentioned him previously in my blog, as I tried to recruit people to watch his reality show, Scott Baio is 45 and Single. Scott became the object of my desire when I was ten. I distinctly remember an art project in grade four where I made a picture of a TV screen that said, “Tania Loves Chachi”. I was a huge Happy Days fan, but I think the crush started after seeing the not-so-critically acclaimed film, Zapped. I can’t really remember much about the movie except that Scott Baio’s character acquired telekinetic powers, which he used to undress his girlfriend during the sex scene. WHERE WERE OUR PARENTS WHILE WE WERE WATCHING THIS???

Ricky Schroeder: Here we are…face to face…a couple of silver spoons… That was music to my ears in grade five. Now here was a guy that I really had a chance with! He was close to my own age! I sent him pictures of my 11-year-old self in a bathing suit, feeling most certain that he would hop on a plane to meet me as soon as he had a chance. Still waiting. I think I should have sent a different picture. My 11-year-old self did not realize that a pot belly and only one recently sprouted bud of a breast was not a good look - especially in a bathing suit.

Michael Jackson: Oh don’t pretend that you didn’t like him too! Those were the Thriller days, and he was all everyone in grade five and six could talk about. I bought all the albums and I wore about ten MJ buttons on my shirt every day. I desperately wanted the red jacket with all the zippers but could never have afforded one. I did NOT wear one white glove – even I thought that was lame. He wasn’t typically featured in the teen magazines, so I had to resort to the National Inquirer, and other crappy tabloids to find pictures to get excited about. I did manage to acquire a larger-than-life-size poster:

I think I'm just gonna let you make your own joke here.

Beyond my MJ days, I think it just became a little uncool to do the poster thing. Looking at the pics that I posted here, I'm glad it ended. Is it me or did my tastes get progressively worse as time went on? Who would have been next? Boy George?

That was truly an enjoyable exercise. I think I'd like to spread some joy by tagging Kgirl, and Gabriella.