At Least She is Thankful for Something...

Today I was standing outside Pumpkin's Hebrew school with another mom, waiting for our children's release from their grade one class. My companion's son came running out first, waving a piece of paper in his hand.

"We wrote a letter to God!", he beamed, obviously proud of his accomplishment.

The other mom and I read the letter together:

Dear God,

Thank you for my wonderful life! I love my life! Thank you for my good health and my family too! I love them all so much. I am so happy with everything.

I'm not in the slightest bit religious, but this letter was so touching for me that tears welled up in my eyes. How nice is it that this little boy feels this way, and how proud must this mother feel that her son expressed such wonderful emotion?

Then I braced myself for Pumpkin's letter. It read:

Dear God,

Thank you for bread.

This Will Not Hook Me on Phonics

Check out the spelling list for Pumpkin's grade 1 class this week:

Not Even Technology Can Save Me!

I hate that I have become a cliche. Mommy-brain, or call it whatever you want, has sunken in and taken hold. I've been arguing that I just have too much on my mind, which is why I can't keep track of everything, but I'm starting to believe that I'm just becoming stupid.

I write stuff on a paper calendar when I have a scheduled event. Ridiculously though, I sometimes forget to look at it. Not looking at this calendar recently led me to showing up two days early for a vet appointment, 45 minutes away from my house, through rush-hour traffic! Fortunately, the veterinarian took pity on me and saw me anyways.

Last week, I made plans with my friend for her and her kids to come over for dinner. In an effort to be more proactive in keeping my plans straight, I decided to enter the visit in the calendar in my iPhone. I also set the phone to give me a day's notice. I have no idea if the phone ever notified me. I don't even know what this notification would look or sound like. I do know that I probably should have recorded the event on my paper calendar that I at least look at sometimes!

While giving Pumpkin a bike-riding lesson after camp late this afternoon, I noticed a car driving towards my house. I stared at the car for a bit, then turned back to Pumpkin, figuring it was just someone cruising around.

Then the car stopped, the driver rolled down the window, and just stared at me. 'Do I know you?', I wondered. The driver looked familiar, but my friend's funky haircut prevented my mental circuitry from making any useful synapses.

"Did you forget that we were coming?", she asked. I couldn't even manage to TRY to fake it. I could have blamed her hair cut, or lack of familiarity with her car, but I didn't. I just stood there, dumbfounded, contemplating take-out dinner options, wondering what has become of my brain.

More Fun at the Drug Store

Not that any of you are particularly interested in my menstrual habits, but today's funny stems from a recent trip to drug store to purchase some monthly supplies.

The feminine hygiene aisle is clearly marked at this particular store, providing opportunity for any meandering, male customers to avoid it if they so desire. I know that this is kind of a sexist comment, but after long ago listening to a tirade from an ex-boyfriend who was opposed to the advertising of 'girly' products during the hockey game, I have just assumed that guys would rather avoid the subject.

While I stood there before a wall of promised, superior absorbency, I noticed that there were several brands on sale, none of those being my usual. This disrupted my intended quick purchase as I hesitated to deliberate a possible switch of such a personal item, one that I had been using since the day that my mom bought me my first box back in grade eight.

As I pondered, an elderly man came walking towards me, complaining about how impossible it was to find anything in this place. He stopped right next to me and stared at the same packages that I was staring at. Feeling embarrassed for him, I joked, "Well whatever you're looking for, it's probably not in this section! Ha.... Ha...". He walked away, leaving me to my thoughts about brand loyalty vs. saving a whole dollar.

Maybe a minute later, yes I was still standing there, the elderly man returned. 'Awkward', I thought, dreading his approach, already thinking about diffusing any further embarrassment. This time, he didn't stop. He just walked by me muttering something about diapers.

You know what, Buddy? You're on your own!

No Bones About It...

It was a fun end to the season!

Just 'Cause it Made Me Laugh...

From an article in today's Star:

“The tryptophan content in turkey is no more than in any other kind of meat, and yet people have latched onto the idea that it makes you sleepy,” says MacFarlane, sounding exasperated. “The only reason you’re sleepy is because you’ve had way too much alcohol, way too much food and you’re with relatives you don’t like.”

Justification for a Personal Trainer

We have an eliptical trainer. It's a pretty nice one, similar to the ones at the gym, or at least similar to the ones that were at the gym the last time I actually set foot in one. That would be about eight years ago. We purchased the machine to replace my gym membership, figuring that the law of convenience would prompt me to exercise a little more. And I did. For a while.

Then the kids came along, my schedule was no longer, I was too tired, yadda yadda yadda, and so I haven't been as diligent as originally planned.

Today, however, I felt motivated enough to dig out part of my neglected coolmax wardrobe, and hop back on that machine with the goal of not feeling so decrepit upon getting out of bed each morning.

Perhaps I had managed to convince myself that I haven't been quite as lazy as I actually have been, because I had a major shock when I pulled up my I.D. on the eliptical's computer for the purpose of updating the information. It showed my age as 34. I'm currently 38.

That last break was a doozie! At least my recorded weight from 4 years ago is higher than my current one! Imagine how much lower it would be if I hadn't spent the past four years sitting on the couch with a bag of chips!

Home Ownership is Fun!

At the beginning of this week, we initiated our plan to rip out the circa 1982 bar from our basement, with the intention of making a better play space for the kids. It was an unsightly bar, and we weren't planning on hiring a bartender, so why keep it?

Well, there was a fair bit of mould within the particle board constructed bar, so our handyman thought it a good idea to pull off the baseboard from the wall behind the bar, just to see what there was to see. More mould.

Based on that, we decided to rip out the carpet that was near the bar, and install a nice new floor for the whole area. There was mould almost all the way through, which led to the removal of the sub floor as well.

With mould now being the greatest concern, we thought it would be good to cut away a couple of feet of drywall from the walls that we knew had previous water damage, just to verify that water was no longer getting in, and that it would be safe to patch up the walls and install the new floor.

The foundation was clearly leaking.

So, it would appear that we have to now dig up at least one side of the house, but probably all four. We also have to rip out all of the basement drywall and insulation along the perimeter, such that we can dry everything out before repairing it. I imagine a demolition team will be here in the next couple of weeks.

Is it too late to hire a bartender?

It's a Start

Happy New Year, everybody!

I obviously took a break after the namopoblowme thingy, but supposedly I'm rested and refreshed, and ready to play again. I always need to start slowly after a break, so let me start with a piece of advice:

If you happen to have strep throat, even if you are on the mend, wasabi is not the recommended food of choice during this time.